Resilience
The word resilience might make us think of someone strong and resourceful who is never down or out. A resilient person just keeps going.
Right?
That’s not necessarily so. If you’ve ever read the book “Pollyanna,” by Eleanor H. Porter, even the title character, known for her optimism no matter the circumstances, almost gave up.
Yes, resilient people do get back up but sometimes it comes with a cost. Being resilient takes time to develop and even the most resilient person will get tired and worn out. Sometimes you can’t find the energy to keep going when it seems everything is against you or just not working out no matter how hard you try.
According to Dictionary.com, the definition of resilience is:
the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness.
"the often remarkable resilience of so many British institutions"the ability of a substance or object to spring back into shape; elasticity.
"nylon is excellent in wearability and resilience"
I agree that resilience is the ability to recover, but I don’t agree that it is always quickly. We’ve all been through hard times that can take us years to deal with or get through. Those cases don’t seem to resolve quickly at all. In fact those times can feel like they will NEVER end! Getting through these times is an exercise in building resilience because you begin to realize that if you can handle THAT, other things won’t seem so bad.
Definition 2 is how we might visualize resilience. A person gets knocked down but then gets right back up, sort of like that old toy Stretch Armstrong. You just keep snapping back into shape no matter how hard life pulls you, and we all know sometimes it feels like life is trying to pull us apart.
BUT. (And isn’t there always one?)
While we might not snap back quickly, we can all build resilience because it is really a mindset. It is saying to yourself, “Okay, today really sucked. But that doesn’t mean tomorrow will.” It also means that you must absorb the shocks of life to build up your resilience. Remember your Nietzche: “What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.” That’s a great quote about resilience because experience is the process that teaches us resilience, not a class or a book.
In a time where we are finally talking honestly and openly about the need to care for our mental health in the same way we do our physical health, discussing and practicing resilience is more important than ever.
Here’s a great article from the American Psychological Association (APA) on building resilience.